So Close But Still So Far

"So Close To Reaching That Famous Happy End
Almost Believing This Ones Not Pretend
Now You're Beside Me and Look How Far We've Come
So Far We Are So Close"
"So Close" By Jon McLaughlin

So I love how things start to get decent and then it never fails to let you get dropped on your face.
I remember when we were starting to plan our big "Independence Day" where we were going to defy and surprise them by moving out. And then I became "homeless in the eyes of the state"
I remember the day of our 1 year anniversary and the look in his eye when he told me he was going to propose but didn't have the money for the ring that he felt "I deserved"
I remember the day when we decided we were going to start planning our wedding despite the fact that we weren't officially engaged yet. And then his car broke down and is going to cost us 500$ to fix.
I remember the day that his mom made me feel lower then dirt and I packed my shit to leave. And he cried, telling me that "Even though I may not believe him, I was his whole world." and when my simple reply was "So" he hit a wall and went into the living room to cry without embarrassing himself.
I know in my heart he loves me but why is it that a love like ours always manages to get fucked up?
God I know I did wrong in your eyes by having "relations" with him before we were married but does that give you the right to scorn me?

*le sigh*